Just venting a little.

Today in chapel, we had a guest worship leader. Nothing wrong with that... until the offering time came.

RIGHT before the announcements leading up to the collecting of the offering, she said, "Now. If you guys enjoyed the songs we sang today, they're available on a CD that I made. You guys don't have it because it came out a few weeks ago. They're normally $10 but you guys are college students. I'm sure that if it came down to you guys choosing between having to spend $10 on a meal at the cafeteria or $10 for a CD, you'd choose the meal for sure. That's why I've decided to sell them for $5 today."

She walked off the stage and the announcements were made.

Then following the announcements, she came back up to sing an offertory song and started it off by going, "this is the title track of the album for sale outside the chapel. I hope you guys enjoy."

Anyone else feel something a little off about that?

Hello friends.

So a little moment ago, I was cleaning my dorm room, putting some stuff away, had my iPod on shuffle and was listening to some music. I sat down after everything was organized then realized that my hearing in my right ear had changed.

For those of y'all who don't know, I have some hearing loss and tinnitus. I hear a high-pitched noise constantly... like the same kind that you can hear when you turn on an old TV.

So, with this in mind, as I was listening to this music, and realized that something had gone wonky in my ear, I had a momentary freak out. I had no idea how I was gonna fix this, if I could fix it, if my hearing had made a turn for the worse, etc.

Then this song came on...



It wasn't so much the first bit of the song that made me kinda sit back and go, "huh." Read the last bit of the lyrics.

I need words
As wide as sky
I need language large as
This longing inside
And I need a voice
Bigger than mine
And I need a song to sing You
That I've yet to find
I need You,
Oh, I need You
I need You,
Oh, I need You
To be here now
To be here now
To hear me now
To hear me now

At that moment, to me, this wasn't my song to the Lord... Maybe it's God's song to me.

The song called me, first and foremost, to be here now.

It says in the Bible that the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, etc. Dwelling in the Spirit will give birth to the fruit of the Spirit.

As we are here in His presence, let's hear His calling for us.

Ephesians 4 says:

"I... urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintaining the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."

I think this is a good wake-up call for me.

And maybe this is for you as well. Maybe not in the same way as me... but how many of y'all struggle as I do with patience. Or gentleness in certain situations. Are we inclined to love those who are annoying? Or do we just "put up with them" because it's the societal norm?

I urge all y'all who read this. I'm not saying that it'll be easy. But let's be in His presence, and as we hear His call, let's live life walking in a manner worthy of the calling.

By the way, as the last bit of the song came on, my hearing was back to normal.

"We are often drawn away from obedience by the abuse of grace... We abuse grace when we think we can sin and then receive forgiveness by claiming 1 John 1:9. We abuse grace when, after sinning, we dwell on the compassion and mercy of God to the exclusion of His holiness and hatred of sin."

Whoa.

So I had a roommate who is OBSESSED with keeping the lights off in the room. At times, even though I am doing homework and need lights on, he'll just switch the lights off.

It never ceased to amaze me this odd and incessant need to have the lights off. I asked him one time why he always wants to have the lights off. He replied, "I dunno. I just like it. It's for mood."

And I just sat back and couldn't help but be puzzled at the parallel between this situation and how a lot of people live life. So many people choose to live in darkness. People choose to be held captive to the sin because it feels good. They just like it. They choose to give into their sinful nature.

It's a good reminder that these people are the ones that we are called to minister to. Those people who live among us... and still actively choose to live in the darkness.

There was a song that we did on my FT year with CTI titled "God of Justice." And like that song calls us to do, I encourage y'all. Walk humbly. Love mercy.

"Holiness, then, is not necessary as a condition of salvation- that would be salvation by works- but as a part of salvation- that is received by faith in Christ"
-The Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges